


I Won't Live That Long

by Th13f0fH0p3



Category: Homestuck
Genre: F/F, M/M, Sadstuck, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-03
Updated: 2018-12-03
Packaged: 2019-09-06 04:26:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,414
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16825111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Th13f0fH0p3/pseuds/Th13f0fH0p3
Summary: No one knows what happens after a god dies.





	I Won't Live That Long

**Author's Note:**

> 1\. A disclaimer there is a suicide that occurs so if you're sensitive to that don't read this. It's not very graphic but the whole story focuses on that and what happens afterwards.  
> 2\. Another disclaimer is that I have no idea what the hell this is or why I made it.  
> 3\. Also, if you came here for good writing, leave and go to one of my other stories although who knows how good those ones are anyway. This one is not meant to be good. this was for fun. It was not edited at all. I wrote this is in like an hour.

Your name is Dave Strider and you’re trying not to worry about what’s coming. You tell yourself that nothing will happen, that Rose was wrong and that there’s nothing to worry about. But of course you worry about it, and of course there is. It’s a Sunday when it happens. When the sky lights up. When Karkat holds you in his arms and cries. When Rose bursts into your apartment with blood coming from her head and Kanaya in her arms. She says that she’s fine, that Kanaya’s fine, just unconscious. Karkat screams and doesn’t listen. He’s torn between holding you and holding his moirail and you can tell that Rose isn’t as fine as she says she is. You ask her what happened. She says that John is dead.

Your name is Jade Harley and you know what happened the instant you saw the sky. It’s an unnatural blue, a pillar of white shooting up from the sky that shines light everywhere like a second sun on the surface of the planet. Everything is suddenly too bright and you have to avert your eyes from it before you blind yourself. In your heart there is an empty feeling and you just know that something happened to John.

Your name is Rose Lalonde and you were there when it happened. It happened at John’s house, in his bedroom, where you and Kanaya desperately tried to stop the bleeding. A hole in his chest gushed red. He was still alive but not for long. Then, without warning, in the same instant that his pulse went flat, the pillar appeared. You were thrown back through a wall and you laid on the ground as your head rung for a while. Eventually when your nausea ceased, you stood and called out for Kanaya. You found her unharmed for the most part, but not awake. When you tried to check on John, you couldn’t find him. There was only the light. If you had been anyone else, you would probably be dead. But you’re a god tier, and god tiers don’t die that easily.

Your name is Dave Strider and it’s been a week since John died. 

“Not died, killed himself,” Rose always corrects you when you say this.

You just give her the middle finger and she hugs you. It’s weird that she does that. She never really was a hugger, and neither were you. Both of you hug a lot more since John left.   
“Not left,” Rose says. “He killed himself.”

When you talk to Rose she tells you that you have to face facts. 

“John killed himself. He didn’t leave. He wasn't killed. He didn’t pass away. He committed suicide via a bullet to his heart,” she says it all in a heartbeat.

You don’t know how she does it. She watched him die. Maybe it’s easier that way. More likely it’s just that Rose sucks at coping mechanisms. Not like you’re any better. 

Karkat tries to talk to you about it sometimes, “If you need to talk, you know I’m here for you.”

You never say anything to that. He just huffs and turns away from you. Both of you are hurting and you both suck at coping mechanisms.

Your name is Jade Harley and it’s been a week since your brother committed suicide. When you stand at where it happened, you feel this feeling in the air. It’s suffocating. It makes you choke and run away. The area around it is dead. All the plants and animals are just… dead. You guess that’s what happens when a god dies. You are John’s sister, but you’re also a scientist. It makes you sick to do it, but you take samples of the surrounding area according to the proximity of the incident. You record data and do lab reports on it. All of your subordinates don’t know about it. This is something you have to do on your own. Nobody should know.

Then one day you enter your office and Rose is sitting on your desk. A piece of paper is in her hand. It’s a paper copy of the results for the soil content around the area. You rush over and snatch it out of her hand. She doesn’t flinch when you get real close to her face and growl. Your ears are flat against your head and your teeth are bared.

“What do you think you’re doing?” You hiss.

She looks at you like you’re an idiot, “What do you think I’m-”

This time she does flinch when you grab her by the throat and press her against the desk, “What. The fuck. Do you. Think. You’re doing.”

The Seer manages to choke out, “I’m trying to tell you that what you’re doing is dangerous.”

You turn and throw her onto the ground, “Get the fuck out of my office.”

She does so without saying anything else. For a moment you’re satisfied that she’s afraid, and then you feel absolutely horrible. You sit on the floor leaning against the desk and hold your face in your hands.

Your name is Rose Lalonde and you’re a little concerned about your friends. Dave is cutting himself off from everyone and Jade has become overly aggressive. The bruises on your neck haven’t even started to heal yet, even though it’s been a few days. Kanaya keeps asking about them. You tell her they’re nothing. Of course, she’s not an idiot and you’ve been fighting about it since they appeared. It doesn’t matter as much as she thinks they do. Jade is just grieving, you’re sure she’ll get better.

Your names is Dave Strider and it’s been a year since John committed suicide. Since it happened, Jade has gone completely off her rocker and Rose hasn’t been seen in months. Last week Kanaya went to go confront Jade about her wife’s disappearance. She hasn’t come back.

Your name is Jade Harley and it’s been a year since the area surrounding your deceased brother’s house became contaminated. The readings are off the chart. On everything. The amount of sulfur in the air? Way too much. The amount of everything is insane. You get why everything dies when it goes in there. And the area has just spread. It’s a mile in diameter now. The rate that it’s spreading is exponential. You’re freaking out here.

You’re freaking out to the point you’ve nearly killed one of your best friends. Rose is fine now, but you keep her close. She asks you if she can go outside. You tell her it’s not the best idea.

Your name is John Egbert and ten years ago you committed suicide. In those years, you’ve watched your friends crumble. A few years ago your sister joined you. She didn’t commit suicide though. Rose killed her. You don’t blame her if you’re being honest. Since you died, your sister had really gone mad. Not long after that, Rose did too. Being exposed to the death’s of two gods did her in. She didn’t appear in the same place you and Jade did when you both died. You don’t understand why. Jade says that the horrorterrors took her as payment for her using their power all those years ago in the game.

Most recently, Dave has joined you. He holds Karkat’s hand, and the two of them seem happy. You don’t understand why they’re here though. It’s like they just died one day for no reason. 

Eventually the other trolls join you. Kanaya, strangely, is the last one to come. After Terezi and Vriska, there is Kanaya. She lived her full lifespan and died of old age. Even so, she seems happier dead than in the last few centuries of her life, or whenever it was that Rose died.

Finally, Rose joins you. She seems different for a few… days. Then she returns back to normal. You think that they’re all better now than they were alive. There’s nothing to worry about here. Even though you tell her not to, Rose does. She worries and worries and asks you about your eyes. You tell her that’s just how people’s eyes look here. And that’s true. Everyone’s eyes do look like that here. She’s the only one without them. When you give them her new eyes, she’s scared. She tells you that she can’t see. You tell her not to worry. Soon enough, she doesn’t. Everyone’s happy here. You would never let her ruin that for you.

**Author's Note:**

> I know this is trash and not cohesive but I just want to have fun and write weird angsty shit so yeah


End file.
